Today’s PRP can greatly enhance the satisfaction that you and your mate get from your conversations. This PRP is especially powerful if you’re going through a very difficult time. For example, if you’re not feeling well, or having some health challenges; if you’re stressed at work; or if you’re experiencing financial stress, this PRP will help you to communicate in a loving manner with your spouse, or at the very least interact with courtesy and respect. And when you’re really stressed, that can be difficult to do.
Very often when people are stressed, the natural reaction is to lash out at those who are closest to them. So, how do you know if you’re lashing out at your spouse? How do you know if you’re using them as an emotional dumping ground? If your purpose for talking to them is to try to get rid of your negative feelings by transferring those negative feelings to them, then you’re using your mate as an emotional dumping ground. If your goal is to try to dump your negative feelings, and the negative energy associated with them, on your spouse then you’re using your mate as an emotional dumping ground. This type of communication tends to create distance in the relationship. But couples who have long-lasting, loving relationships tend to have conversations that bring them closer together.
The last time you were extremely stressed and spoke to your spouse about what was bothering you, were you transferring the negative emotions that you were feeling to your mate? Did your conversation push your spouse further away? Or, did you share your thoughts and feelings in a way that allowed the two of you to feel closer, without your mate feeling that they were being emotionally dumped on?
Today’s passionate relationship principle (PRP) is this: Your Spouse is not Your Emotional Dumping Ground.
Dr. Simon Whittaker – The Relationship Doctor at Center for Passionate Relationships (CPR)