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Ladies, do your marriage self-evaluation scores measure up to the Marriage Performance Review scores of your  husband—the one who’s evaluating you? 

1/12/2015

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Today’s passionate relationship principle (PRP) is for the ladies, and it’s in the form of a question: Ladies, do your marriage self-evaluation scores measure up to the Marriage Performance Review scores of your  husband—the one who’s evaluating you? 

In some of the previous segments I suggested that you do a self-evaluation of your performance in your marriage (#MarriagePerformanceReview).   Ladies, since the men were guided to do a self-evaluation in the previous segments, you have some advance warning about this—I’m sure you knew it was coming. 



Ladies, let’s examine some of the specific questions that you’ll be evaluated on—these questions are also from one of the previous segments. 

  • Ladies, is your husband as happy and content as he was in the beginning (when you first met and got married)?  


  • What brings him joy?  

  • What’s puts a smile on his face?  

 So, if your husband were conducting your marriage performance review for last year and he asked you: “Am I as happy and content as I was when we first met and when we were first married?”  Would his response match the response that you gave yourself for your self-evaluation?  During your self-evaluation, did you write: “Yes, my husband is just as happy and content as when we first met and when we were first married.  I’ve earned a perfect score in this category.”?  Now that he’s performing your annual review, will he agree with the score that you’ve given yourself, or will he say that you’ve only earned 50% instead of the 100% that you thought you earned.    Ladies, getting this feedback from your husband during the Marriage Performance Review can give you valuable information to help you both know if your marriage is on the right track. 

These questions have something in common, they require that you have the kind of communication in your marriage that is satisfying and enriching (we covered some of the specific tools to accomplish this in the September and October blogs).  When both spouses are satisfied with how they communicate with each other, they are better connected and aware of what is happening in the life of their mate.  So, Ladies, even if you don’t appreciate or understand some of the things that bring him joy (like watching football, hunting, video games, or fishing), knowing what brings him joy and respecting his choice, can go a long way toward helping him to feel accepted in the relationship.

Today’s passionate relationship principle (PRP) is for the ladies, and it’s in the form of a question: : Ladies, do your marriage self-evaluation scores measure up to the Marriage Performance Review scores of your  husband—the one who’s evaluating you? 

Dr. Simon Whittaker – The Relationship Doctor at Center for Passionate Relationships (CPR)

 #MarriagePerformanceReview, #CommuinicationInMarriage, #lovecpr



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    Author

    Dr. Simon Whittaker
    is a  relationship  and sexual integrity coach,  and former host of the Radio Talk Show Relationship Fridays.  He helps singles prepare for their ideal relationship and helps couples enhance their relationship. He also and serves as a recovery coach specializing in addressing lust, porn, sex, and love addiction.  

    The Blog - 
    After examining national research of long-term, happily married couples by Olson, Olson-Sigg, and Larson (2008), we are presenting  powerful tools in the blog.  I will be focusing on one of the important characteristics and give specific tools and principles that you can apply immediately to enhance your relationship.   Whether you are single and want to prepare for a great relationship someday or married and want to ensure that your marriage is as fulfilling as it can be, you’ll find these principles to be valuable.   After all don’t you want your relationship to be passionate?   

    Teleconference audio files can be accessed by clicking on Services then Podcasts. 

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