Men, let’s examine the remaining specific questions from one of the previous segments in which we discussed the Marriage Performance Review: “What are her dreams, and what are you doing to help her realize them? What will keep her excited about her life? What will get her excited about her relationship with you? What can you do to encourage her to strengthen her relationship with God?”
Once again, if your wife were conducting your marriage performance review for last year and she asked you: What are my dreams, and what are you doing to help my realize them? What will keep me excited about my life? What will get me excited about my relationship with you? What can you do to encourage me to strengthen my relationship with God?”
Would her response match the response that you gave for your self-evaluation? Based on your self-evaluation, did you give yourself perfect score on to indicate that you’ve done a perfect job on these items? Now that she’s performing your annual review, will she agree with the score that you’ve given yourself, or will she say that you’ve only earned 50% instead of the 100% that you thought you earned.
Guys, these questions have something in common, they require that the two of you not only have ongoing satisfying communication, but they require that as a couple the two of you have the kind of relationship in which you can share your true feelings and a level emotional intimacy that allows you to feel safe sharing your dreams and the things that are really important to you. If you want to enhance the emotional intimacy in your relationship and be able to share your true feelings, review the blog posts in November and December. Those posts focused on helping couples express their true feelings.
Questions and Actions
Start by addressing one of the questions listed above. Guys, what are your wife’s dreams? What are you doing to help her realize her dreams? If you don’t know the answer to this, now is the time to find out—ask her. Keep in mind that if your relationship doesn’t yet have enough emotional intimacy and safety, she may not be willing to share all of her dreams. But, by asking her to share some of her dreams you will be making progress.
Today’s passionate relationship principle (PRP) is for the guys, it’s a continuation of the previous PRP, and it’s in the form of a question: Guys, do your marriage self-evaluation scores measure up to the Marriage Performance Review scores of your wife—the one who’s evaluating you? (Part 2)
Dr. Simon Whittaker – The Relationship Doctor at Center for Passionate Relationships (CPR)
#MarriagePerformanceReview, #CommuinicationInMarriage, #lovecpr